What Is a Waldorf Bedtime Routine?

A Waldorf bedtime routine is the same short sequence every night, in the same order, in low light. An early supper, a bath, pyjamas and teeth. Then a story told or read, a verse or prayer, one quiet song and lights out. It takes about 30 minutes and has no screens in it. Many Waldorf families put young children to bed early so they get the 10 to 13 hours of sleep the American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommends at ages 3 to 5.

The routine is one piece of a larger evening rhythm, and that's where most of the calm comes from.

What does a calm evening rhythm look like in Waldorf?

Waldorf teachers talk about the day breathing in and out. The morning is the in-breath: circle, main lesson, focused work. The afternoon breathes out into play and time outside. The evening breathes in again, slowly, toward sleep. Our daily rhythm guide walks through the whole day.

The evening starts well before bedtime. Waldorf Academy Toronto puts it plainly on its blog: the key to a good day is the night before. So the evening rhythm begins with supper.

Here is one evening for a child in kindergarten or grade 1.

5:30pm: Supper. Early, simple, at the table, with a candle and a blessing. The same time each night.

6:15pm: The in-between. Clear the table together. Wipe it down, sweep under the chairs, lay out tomorrow's clothes. A short walk round the block in summer. This is the bridge from the busy day to bedtime, and it's where evenings often come apart, so give it a shape.

6:45pm: Bath and pyjamas. Warm water, low light. Many families turn off the big lights here and use lamps or a candle from now on. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests dimming the lights before bedtime.

7:00pm: Teeth, then bed. Your child gets into bed before the story, so the story is the last thing, not the thing before another task.

7:05pm: Story, verse, song. Then the light goes out.

Move the clock to fit your family. Keep the order.

What is a Waldorf bedtime routine, step by step?

The Waldorf Publications bedtime piece describes a routine of about 30 minutes. Pyjamas and teeth come first, then a story read or told. Your child gets into bed for a short talk about the day, a prayer or verse and a song. Then the light goes out. It calls that half hour a sacrifice for parents, and on a tired evening it is.

Choose your steps and write them down. For a young child, five or six steps is plenty. Then do them in the same order every night, even on holidays when you can.

The story. Waldorf families often tell the bedtime story rather than read it. For a young child, one story told every night for a week is better than a new book each night. Young children often love to hear the same story again. Our storytelling guide has stories by age and how to learn one without the book.

For a child in grade 1 or 2, a chapter read aloud from a longer book is lovely too. Keep it gentle. Save the exciting chapter for the afternoon.

Looking back at the day. Once your child is lying down, the Waldorf Publications piece suggests asking them to remember one hard thing from the day and then one wonderful thing. Keep it to a minute. You're not solving the hard thing, only letting it be said before sleep.

The verse or prayer. One short verse or prayer, said the same way every night. Some families use a traditional evening prayer, some a verse about the stars, some a few words of thanks for the people who love the child. Choose what fits your family's beliefs. Say it slowly, with a hand on your child's back. It's the evening partner to the morning verse.

The song. One song, the same one for months, sung softly. It doesn't need to be a Waldorf song and you don't need a good voice. Our singing guide lists songbooks with bedtime songs.

Then lights out, and you leave.

What time do Waldorf children go to bed?

There's no official Waldorf bedtime. In practice, young children in Waldorf families often go to bed early, around 7 to 7:30pm in the early grades.

The health guidance gives you the numbers to work from. The American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommends, per 24 hours:

• Ages 1 to 2: 11 to 14 hours, including naps.
• Ages 3 to 5: 10 to 13 hours, including naps.
• Ages 6 to 12: 9 to 12 hours.

The AASM links getting enough sleep regularly with better attention, behavior, learning, memory and emotional regulation.

Work back from the time your child wakes. A 4-year-old who's up at 6:30am and no longer naps needs to be asleep by about 7:30pm to get 11 hours. A 7-year-old who wakes at 7am and sleeps 10 hours is asleep by 9pm at the latest. If your child wakes tired or melts down every afternoon, try moving bedtime 15 minutes earlier for a week.

Should a Waldorf bedtime include screen-free time?

Yes. In a Waldorf-inspired home, the evening is screen-free, and here the health advice lines up with Waldorf practice.

The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests turning off all screens at least an hour before bedtime. It also recommends keeping TVs, tablets, laptops and phones out of children's bedrooms, especially at night. Waldorf Academy Toronto goes further and says screens are never part of the bedtime routine it recommends to families.

That hour is easier to fill than it sounds: the table cleared, the bath run, a story told. If screens are a bigger question in your house, our screen time article looks at the research by age.

How do you make bedtime calmer for toddlers?

Keep it shorter and keep it the same. A toddler's routine might be bath, pyjamas, teeth, one picture book or a short told story, one song, and lights out.

There's good research behind the sameness. A 2009 study in the journal Sleep followed 405 mothers and their babies or toddlers. Half the families kept a simple nightly routine for two weeks: a bath, a massage or lotion, then quiet time like cuddling and singing. Lights went out within 30 minutes of the bath. The children fell asleep faster and woke less in the night. The toddlers were less likely to call out or climb out of bed. The mothers' mood improved too.

A few things that often help with toddlers:

• Warn gently, once. "When the bath is done, it's time for pyjamas."
• Sing the transitions. A little made-up song for teeth or pyjamas often works where an instruction doesn't.
• Keep the room dull. A few soft toys, low light, nothing new to look at.
• Be the calm one. Slow your own voice and movements.

If you have a toddler and an older child, the older one can have a few extra minutes of reading after the toddler is down. It becomes a small privilege of being bigger.

When the evening falls apart

Some nights it will. Someone was sick, supper was late, the visit ran long. Don't drop the routine; shorten it. Skip the bath, keep the pyjamas, teeth, the verse and the song. The shape stays, even if half the steps don't happen.

And if bedtime has been a battle for months, start again small. Choose three steps: pyjamas, one story, one song. Do them the same way every night for two weeks before you add anything. The Waldorf School of Lexington's early childhood teacher writes that predictable adult actions around sleeping and waking give children a feeling of safety. That's the whole idea. You don't have to get it right every night. You only have to keep coming back to it.

Where to start tonight

Write down your evening in five or six steps, from supper to lights out. Choose one verse and one song. Tonight, dim the lights after supper, put the screens away and do the steps in order. Do the same tomorrow.